She once had an odd dream one morning and woke up apologizing to me. Apparently she hooked up with Clive Owen and was agonizing over how to break up with me.

I laughed and told her “go ahead and date Clive if you wish but please take some good photos so we can blackmail him later.”

Soon thereafter, I realized that she had other crushes as well. Ones that in my opinion could never go up against me, a real Puerto Rican. Later on, I made the huge mistake of asking her who the sexiest man would be? Whether real, fantasy, celebrity, open choice.

She thought about it for a few seconds then dove into a lengthy monologue about how one particular Swedish actor tickled her fancy.

All I could do was listen, smile and nod every now and then as I wondered how I was going to tell her about that thing I had with Scarlett Johansson during a trip to Vegas.